Criminal Captured After
15 Years
It took years but it was
caught...and...the trial is soon to commence.
The
Criminal...
Betty
Bench
The Dastardly
Act:
Evading prosecution for 15 years while
residing in an unauthorized area, using the alias "landscaping
accessory".
...but then it happened
!
The "heat" had caught on
!
And a familiar sight showed
up....
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...with his
friend....
...with a familiar
sound...
But because they were unauthorized to
arrest the fugitive, they made note of the situation and called in two others to
investigate the atrocity !
And yet another sound could be heard as
they approached the homeowner !
As they cautiously approached the
"mouth piece" for the criminal fugitive from justice, one of the men said
loudly....
"What's this all
about?" asked the frightened homeowner.
"It's about the
bench...and...eluding capture all these years. It's considered "patio
furniture", is not in an authorized location..and it has to go", said the
man with the badge.
"But it's not patio
furniture, it's a decorative landscaping accessory", said the frightened
woman.
It made no difference to the man. All
he would say was...
The "boys" say it's
"patio furniture"....and what they say, goes...got it sweetheart...it's the
style of life they're concerned with, not
you".
"But I am giving
you the facts....it's not outdoor patio furniture, it's merely a decoration....a
landscaping decoration that is made of cement, is hidden behind a tree, weighs
over 500 pounds...and has been sitting there for 15 years", the woman
pleaded.
So...the woman, petrified of "the
boys", contacted others in the area who she believed would help
her.
And after searching and cruising the
"hood", she eventually discovered members of "the Bench
Gang" that had been "laying low" over the
years.
There was "Bottoms Bonnie" and "Cushie
Clyde".
"Tiny Tush
Tina"
The "Butts
Combo" gang
"Cheap Louie the
Loner"
" Willie
the Wedgie"
"Roger the
Rogue"
"Tiny Hiney"
" Flubby
Fats" with "Daisy
Donut"
"Freddie the Frog
Freak"
"Thunder Thigh
Tina the Tuba"
"Sammie the Sea
Snort"
And
Finally....
"Iron Mamma
Minnie"
Yes...everywhere she turned, the "gang"
had a presence.
Yet...it appeared that only she would
bear the brunt of the prosecution.
So....will the prosecutors seek out the
other offenders, or will they merely settle for prosecuting Betty Bench?
So...we now have the case before
you...the community...the jury !
What say
you?
Is Betty Bench a
landscape ornament or is she patio furniture?
Should she be left alone to live out
the rest of her life in peace, or should she suffer the fate of the wrecker's
ball?
We think she and "The Bench Gang" deserve amnesty and be allowed to coexist
along with the many other "lawn decorations" we discovered
!
Ridiculous? Sad, but
true.
It's just a humorous way to tell
a story of a woman in our community facing a violation of the Rules and being
subjected to a substantial fine...because someone in power...has no common sense and...
"needs to get a
life"
Enjoyed reading the story of "Betty Bench"; and it is sad, but true. They're just now getting around to enforcing the so-called rules. Ridiculous!! There should be no fine, and she should be left alone. We received a notice in the mail last month about our palm tree needing to be trimmed along with a picture of the tree. We take pride in our yard and keep it maintained. After the freeze last year, it caused the branches to brown. We were planning on trimming them just as soon as some of the other branches had come out so it wouldn't look so bad when we cut the brown ones off. We were furious when we got the letter and were ready to get out of SCA. We calmed down, trimmed the branches the very same day, signed and dated the letter, and took it to the office and saying that it had been taken care of. Three weeks after that, we received the very same letter in the mail with the same picture saying it needed to be taken care of. It took another postage stamp paid for by our dues. They must have went up and down our whole street looking for violations. If they sent everyone the same letter twice, that runs into quite a bit of money. We love living in SCA so have calmed down since then, but they do do need to get a life and have some common sense.
ReplyDeleteSunshine, this is the work of individuals who, in my opinions, are tpyical of those who have never been in a position of "power" in their lives, and for some unknown reason, they feel that this must add substance and meaning to what is probably a very dull existence.
DeleteWhat kind of individual gets a kick out of looking for reasons to harm a fellow neighbor for such a petty reason?
Is that a fulfilling way to spend your remaining retirement years?
It certainly wouldn't be my cup of tea, and my guess is that the person responsible for turning that individual in for a possible fine, doesn't have the guts to admit who he or she is either.
It's a shame that those types seem to get their kicks backstabbing others.
From Sam S...to...Anthem Opinions
ReplyDeleteI can't believe that the argument is over what constitutes a garden bench and what is a decorative item.
No one in his right mind would want to sit on a stone bench, without having cushions on it. Obviously, this bench has no cushions on it, ergo, its a decorative item.
Then it just becomes a matter of taste and everyone has their own taste, just like everyone has their opinion.
Even if it had cushions on it, most of the year it would be a decoration, not something to sit on. .
Don't these stone hounds have anything better to do?
Obviously not, Sam.
DeleteCan you remember the famous "coyote lady" and her fence?
The poor woman had her dog mauled, saved it by thrashing the coyote with a broom, and to better protect it, wanted to build a fence to avoid the coyote attacking her dog again.
The Architectural Review committee approved the fence; it was built, and them subsequenly, she got "the letter" which told her it had to be torn down because it supposedly was a foot too high.
This lady even went to all of ther neighbors and asked if it was a problem of any kind, and NONE objected.
Did any of that matter? NOPE.
She was subseuently harassed by several board members, and the matter actually made 2 "HOA Hall of Shame" reports by Darcy Spears a few years ago,
It took a change in board members to "get permission from the pope" for a variance that had previously been approved, and over 2 years to get the matter resolved.
The members of the board made life hell on her for no reason, other than flexing their muscle....the most pathetic "power trip" in the history of Sun City Anthem.